*** Oktoobri offtopic ***

[J0kker]

hahah rage!

[ropka11]

Vaata m6neda pokkeristrateegia videot ? Mdorandi omad cardrunnersist nt suht head.

Nii on.Vaata pokkeristrateegia videot päeval-õhtul või öösel uni on iga kell garanteeritud

[Strawberry]

This got the whole of Sydney laughing. Read it and you'll see why!

Just imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing this. Many Sydney folks DID hear this on the FOX FM morning show in Sydney.

The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is called 'Mate Match'. The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are mar
ried or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant answers'yes',he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions. The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner with (phone number) for verification If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize.

One particular game, however, several months ago made the Harbour City drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest thing you've heard yet.

Anyway, here's how it all went down:

DJ: 'Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?'
Contestant: (laughing) 'Yes, I have.'
DJ: 'Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if you win. What is your name? First only please.'
Contestant: 'Brian.'
DJ: 'Brian, are you married or what?'
Brian: (laughing nervously) 'Yes, I am married.'
DJ: 'Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please.'
Brian: 'Sara.'
DJ: 'Is Sara at work, Brian?'
Brian: 'She is gonna kill me..'
DJ: 'Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?'
Brian: (laughing) 'Yes, she's at work.'
DJ: 'Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?'
Brian: 'About 8 o'clock this morning.'
DJ: 'Atta boy, Brian.'
Brian: (laughing sheepishly) 'Well.....'
DJ: 'Question #2 - How long did it last?'
Brian: 'About 10 minutes.'
DJ: 'Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake.'
Brian: 'Yeah, that trip sure would be nice.'
DJ: 'Okay.. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this morning?
Brian: (laughing hard) 'I, ummm, I, well...'
DJ: 'This sounds good, Brian.. Where was it at?'
Brian: 'Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us for couple of weeks...'
DJ: 'Uh huh...'
Brian: '....and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time.'
DJ: 'Atta boy, Brian.'
Brian: 'On the kitchen table..'
DJ: 'Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and call her up.
[ 3 minutes of commercials follow. ]
DJ: 'Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?'
(Touch tones......ringing....)
Clerk: 'Kinkos.'
DJ: 'Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?'
Clerk: 'This is she.'
DJ: 'Sarah, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now.'
Sarah: (laughing) 'A couple of hours?'
DJ: 'Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the rules of 'Mate Match'?'
Sarah: 'No.'
DJ: 'Good!'
Brian: (laughing)
Sarah: (laughing) 'Brian, what the hell are you up to?'
Brian: (laughing) 'Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest.'
DJ: 'Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off to the Gold Coast for 5 days on us.
Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'
DJ: 'All right. When did you last have sex, Sarah?'
Sarah: 'Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work.'
DJ: 'What time?'
Sarah: 'Around 8 this morning.'
DJ: 'Very good. Next question. How long did it last?'
Sarah: '12, 15 minutes maybe..'
DJ: 'Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?'
Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'
DJ: 'Where did you have it?'
Sarah: 'OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?'
Brian: 'Just tell him, honey..'
DJ: 'What is bothering you so much, Sarah?'
Sarah: 'Well...'
DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have it?
Sarah: 'Up the arse.....'

They had to call an ambulance for the DJ he thought he was going to have a heart attack , he could not stop laughing..

Apparantly there was an unusually high call out of the Sydney Police just after this conversation, for minor traffic collisions

Fake

Old 70s joke.


1:25-1:45

[Kosmonaut]

Unetuse käes vaevlevad inimesed: Otsige netist infot infot "sleep hygiene" ja peaksite leidma suht head infot. Võib proovida ka eestikeelset infot leida.

Üks ülioluline punkt on siin see, et magad siis kui magamisaeg on (mitte nii, et öösel ei maga, siis päeval teed uinaku), kindlad ajad magamiseks.
Magamajäämine: ei tohi olla järjest kaua voodis ja üritada magada. Süsteem on umbes selline, et 15 min üritad magama jääda, siis tõused püsti!! ja teed midagi muud ca 10 min ja seejärel üritad uuesti. (Ajad siin ei pruugi õiged olla, aga enamvähem nii toimib asi).

Üldiselt on kogu see unetuse ravi väga personaalne ja plaan tuleb igal inimesel ise paika sättida - üks asi sobib ühele, teine teisele.

Ja kui internetist otsite meditsiinialast kirjandust, siis pidage meeles, et kõik ei ole tõde. Eesti keeles une kohta uurides tasub uskuda näiteks Marlit Veldi kirjutatud asju. Välismaistest asjadest on üldjuhul ok vaadata erinevate tunnustatud organisatsioonide andmeid, artikleid, juhendeid.

[Relamz]

Martyn Ashton - Road Bike Party

( Click to show/hide )

[privador]

krt mõelge kui ööklubis sebite endale sellise naise ja hommikul vaadates naise passi võiks pikali kukkuda....
http://www.elu24.ee/999672/galerii-5...-musternaidis/

[pokkerisheriff]

irf, valusalt camu tegi ennast lolliks selle "up the arse" looga. arvas, et leidis nüüd mingi uue hea nalja, aga teiste pandud videotest selgub, et tegemist on vana asjaga juba.

[alaska]

Sinu päeva tegi ikka rõõmsamaks, eks?

[ristijeesus]

Tra sheriff sa oled ikka valus idu.

[Carl]

tabletid on overrated. ise olen aspiriini 2x elus võtnud and thats it.

Approven. Üldiselt ka, nohu ravib Jägermeister ja pohmakat kraanivesi.

Ja kui und pole, soovitan voodis passides nutitelefonist(nutitelefoni puudumisel võib vabalt enne mingi hunnik pilte välja ka printida, palju pole vaja.) 9gagi vaadata - see koht on nii allakäinud, et uni tuleb neid "le me gusta pokemoni" pilte vaadates.

[ristijeesus]

Üks hea asi unetuse vastu on melatoniin. Eestis pole seda paar aastat enam saada, aga Usas müüakse toidulisandina igas supermarketis. Kui mõni semu lombi taha satub, siis laske tuua.

[alaska]

Ärge seda mingil juhul tehke!!!! See hormoon jätke rahule.

[ristijeesus]

Miks mitte? Oled mingitest halbadest tagajärgedest kuulnud?

[alaska]

Jah, see vähendab keha enda melatoniinitootmist ja see ei ole hea. Oled järjekordse konksu otsas, et üldse und saada, siis tabletti vaja.

[Cashmer]

Unetuse vastu aitab emaks/isaks saamine - pool aastat magad öösel paari tunni kaupa - nii kui pea patja puudutab - magad, järgmised kuus kuud magad öösel nelja tunni kaupa - uinud 10-15minutiga.

[alaska]

Mul on kõige paremini aidanud sinise valguse vältimine õhtuti, ehk telekas, arvuti, päevavalguslambid. Aitab küünlavalgus, monitorile mingi kollane filter, telekas kinni.

[ristijeesus]

monitorile mingi kollane filter

Tasuta programm selleks http://stereopsis.com/flux/

[alaska]

Tasuta programm selleks http://stereopsis.com/flux/

tnx, seda olengi kasutanud.

[bauss]

PAGE 23 koosneb senini Täielikust Kullast!

noob, 40 posti per page on normaalsel inimesel

[Godspeed_EJ]

Mul on kõige paremini aidanud sinise valguse vältimine õhtuti, ehk telekas, arvuti, päevavalguslambid. Aitab küünlavalgus, monitorile mingi kollane filter, telekas kinni.

Lisaks veel ööseks arvutid, wifid jms kõik välja lülitada ja tuba võimalikult pimedaks teha (ruloo, paksud kardinad jne).

Parim "medikament" une jaoks on muidugi seks.

Orgasms help you sleep better. While an orgasm is followed in the male by a quick drop in blood pressure and sudden relaxation, the effect on women is more progressive, but no less important. Orgasms act as a natural tranquilizer. That wonderful release of endorphins is very calming.